The Lady In The Tower

So, I just spent the better part of the last two hours tracking down info on Libya to condense into an info page for tomorrow's radio show broadcast. And... I don't even know. I think I just found the downside to being a journalist, that's for damn sure.

It's the same feeling I had last week, when I was hunting down the latest on Japan. I mean, I'm thrilled in a way, one that I can't entirely explain. But for years now, every major crisis, my head has been split between feeling terrible for the people involved and wishing desperately that I was old enough and qualified enough to cover it myself. I didn't realize before how wrenching it can be, and I'm just gathering info from news sources and putting it together.

I wish that there was something I could actually do. You know, something besides typing stuff up for the hosts of the show to read out tomorrow and discuss while I work the sound board and make sure everyone actually hears what they have to say. Of course, part of me wishes I could join in the conversation, but that again is a product of what seems to be my split consciousness. I have ambition, and I have my dreams, and I don't feel guilty about that. But I don't think it really occurred to me, deep down, the stuff I'm going to have to work with.

This is the start, and I'm going to have to get used to it. Because when I'm actually out there it's going to be a lot harder. I just have to remember that this is doing something, I'm not just a helpless observer anymore. I think maybe that can be enough, or I certainly hope so anyway.

It's a damn good thing no one uses my computer but me. I have bookmarked some interesting things lately, and read over others. The various fan wikis and Tudor info sites aren't that bad, but... I just bookmarked three different webpages (Wikipedia, a question/answer site, and a Fox News article) on superfecundity. That would be twins who are also half-siblings. Yep, twins with separate fathers. Why am I researching this, do you ask? Well... OT3s. That is all. Or OT3+s, since I also read Anita Blake and have been known to dabble in that fandom. No plans to bring any kids into the Anitaverse (or even to write there, atm) so it's curiosity there, but I do have plans to bring kids in elsewhere. Should be interesting.

Oh, and Inception is haunting me. It's not just the fandom, which is sucking me in like nobody's business, but just... My RA had the idea to decorate our hallway with a "journeys" theme, complete with quotes talking about journeys. So what should be right across from my freaking doorway but a printout of the "You're waiting for a train..." speech? (Inception fans will know why that is creepy as hell.) Then my roommate decided to sing "Non Je Ne Regrette Rien". I vaulted out of the bedroom into the kitchen to ask her if she was singing what I thought she was singing. This is worse than me being able to draw Tudor parallels to basically every writer in my political philosophy class - including Mencius, Confucius, and Marx. No, I do not remember what Marx comparison I used, I dearly wish I did. And yes, I am a geek. Oh well. It happens.